joe lieberman defenestration fanfic

need i say more? (other than it's written by steve coll of the new yorker, and that it's IMMENSELY SATISFYING)

back to regularly scheduled programming

so, i had a weird weekend (i never want to play or be around rock band again), and this week is going to be crazy (rachel going away! 1840 inaugural party! houseguests! hope! change!), but let's bring it back to the comfort zone: people who are the worst. in this case, one person.

this assclown.

a small sample:

What really grates is the portrayal of Jesus as a wimp, or worse. Paintings depict a gentle man embracing children and cuddling lambs. Hymns celebrate his patience and tenderness. The mainstream church, Driscoll has written, has transformed Jesus into “a Richard Simmons, hippie, queer Christ,” a “neutered and limp-wristed popular Sky Fairy of pop culture that . . . would never talk about sin or send anyone to hell.”

but he's cool!! look at his dane cook-esque look!


yeah. fuck that guy.

reading this feels like the News of the Weird stupid criminal section in the CityPaper

jesus christ, blago, you are the WORST.

Throughout the intercepted conversations, Blagojevich also allegedly spent significant time weighing the option of appointing himself to the open Senate seat and expressed a variety of reasons for doing so, including: frustration at being "stuck" as governor; a belief that he will be able to obtain greater resources if he is indicted as a sitting Senator as opposed to a sitting governor; a desire to remake his image in consideration of a possible run for President in 2016; avoiding impeachment by the Illinois legislature; making corporate contacts that would be of value to him after leaving public office; facilitating his wife's employment as a lobbyist; and generating speaking fees should he decide to leave public office. (link)

I can see it now: Rod Blagojevich, standing on stage, flanked by his family and his vice presidential pick, Mobutu Sese Seko, declaring victory and then diving into a pool of gold coins like Scrooge McDuck.

thank you, at least, for looking so sleazy that we all should have seen this coming since day 1. but, you say, thank goodness that none of the upstanding politicians in squeaky-clean Illinois encouraged him in this behavior! cue daily show-style incriminating clip.

According to the statement from prosecutors, Mr. Blagojevich told an adviser last week that he might “get some (money) upfront, maybe” from one of the candidates hoping to replace Mr. Obama. That person was identified only as “Candidate 5.”

In an earlier recorded conversation, prosecutors say, Mr. Blagojevich said he was approached by an associate of “Candidate 5” with an offer of $500,000 in exchange for the Senate seat. (link)

sigh.